Renata
(Evening, Day 3, C'aranth's quarters)

    >>"Then you can tell me why you sat looking at nothing for the whole time 
I was here and made a fire.  Started the food, and spent a long time talking 
about the day just to realize you were not listening."  She set the bottle 
down on the table as they passed it.  "What is wrong?"

    >>"Noth..."

    >>"Don't tell me nothing.  You are not a hard man to read C'aranth.  What 
is wrong?"  She stopped him dead in his tracks at the bathroom door.

    >>"Jeratko hears Berainna when I sleep, she talks to him."  He sighed.

    Renata had been starting - just starting - to think that C'aranth could 
no longer surprise her.  But when he said that, she realized just how wrong 
she'd been.  "Berainna....C'aranth, what are you talking about?  How can he 
hear her...she's..."  

     He nodded, saving her from having to point out that Berainna was dead.  
"I know this, and I can't explain it," he said.  "Many times, I have heard - 
or thought I heard - Berainna speak to me after she was gone.  I could never 
be sure if it was truly her, or if my mind merely played tricks on me.  But 
now...Jeratko says he hears her also, when I sleep.  He even knew about 
Zelandreth...and said that she had told him this!"

     Renata stripped off her wet clothes and slid gratefully into the 
steaming tub, beckoning for C'aranth to join her.  "On the other hand," she 
ventured, "maybe it's just that a part of her lives on within you.  You and 
she were so close to each other...maybe it's really *you* talking to him, but 
it sounds like her...does that make any sense?"  She wasn't sure it did, even 
to her.

     C'aranth smiled crookedly at her as he lowered himself into the tub with 
her.  "In other words, I may just be talking to myself," he said.

     Renata made a face.  "Well, I didn't *exactly* say that, but..."

     "But it's possible, I know," he said, as she slid herself around to lean 
back against his broad chest.  "But...it would be wonderful if, somehow, she 
could still be able to speak to me and Jeratko."

     Renata wasn't sure that, if true, it was all that wonderful.  Berainna 
was gone, and C'aranth owed all of his loyalty to his new dragon, Jeratko.  
There could be no room in his - or any man's heart - for two dragons at the 
same time.  She turned her head so that she could look up at him.  "Does she 
ever speak to you when you're awake?" she asked.  

     "She has done so, though not lately," C'aranth answered.

     Renata thought about it.  "Well, there'd be no sense in having Jeratko 
ask her to tell him something that only she would have known...because if it 
was something you didn't know yourself,  there'd be no way to verify it now."

     C'aranth nodded.  "And if it were something that I know myself, then it 
could be nothing more than some part of my own mind speaking to him."

     "If it *is* her," said Renata, "then perhaps she could still speak to 
her own kind as well as to you.  Ask Jeratko to try and talk to her 
tonight...and I'll ask Vega to try and listen in."

     She pressed herself back tightly against him.   "But in the meantime," 
she said, "I haven't been this sore since I-don't-know-when.  I'll make a 
deal with you...I'll rub you down and you rub me down, deal?   And then, 
maybe we could find some other interesting things to do..."

(Tag Darren - what happens now? :)

* * * * * * * *
Trevor
(Morning, Day 4, med center)
>>Cynthia walked down the corridor carrying a small bundle of food.  She
looked into the room where Trevor was standing near his mother's bed.

>>She knocked and said, "I brought you breakfast."

     "Oh...thanks," he said, not having heard her approach.  He quietly 
joined her out in the corridor.  

     "How is she?" Cynthia asked.  

     Trevor shook his head.  "No change.  S'lomon was in earlier, examining 
her...but he wouldn't say anything about her condition..."

     "It'll be all right," Cynthia tried to reassure him.  "You have to 
believe that."

     He nodded, as he helped her set out the food at a small table nearby.  
He wasn't all that hungry after the long vigil he'd put in last night.  But 
just the fact that Cynthia had thought to bring it meant everything to him.

     "How's the warren?" he asked, feeling a strong need to talk about 
something other than his mother's condition...anything else, in fact.

     "It's slowly coming back together," she told him.  

     "I should be doing something..." he began.

     "You are," she said, laying her hand over his.  "You're helping the 
person who needs you most right now."

     He sighed and shook his head, still feeling useless.  "I know...but I 
can't really do anything to help her either..."

     Just then, they were interrupted by Danki's arrival.  The older woman 
had a look o deep concern on her face.  "Warrenlady, Trevor...S'lomon has 
just come back, and he wants to speak to us...about Kellie."

     Trevor swallowed hard, trying to keep his nervousness from showing.  
"Did he...did he tell you anything"

     Danki shook her head.  "No," she said.  "He's in the room with Turner 
and Kellie now.  He wants us to come in."

     Trevor took a deep breath, and then felt Cynthia's hand on his arm.  Her 
presence, as always, lent him strength.  "All right," he said.  "Let's go."

     S'lomon was waiting for the three of them when they went in.  He 
silently motioned for them to accompany him to a far corner of the room.  
"I've spent most of the night consulting my books," he said, "and I know now 
what needs to be done to save Kellie's life."

     "Then...she'll live?" Trevor asked hopefully.

     "I think so," the healer replied.  "But we need to act today...and it'll 
require a decision.  There are two choices...and both involve risks."

     "Go on," Cynthia told him.

     S'lomon nodded.  "I thought at first that Kellie had suffered prolonged 
oxygen deprivation," he said, "from being underwater too long.  Had that been 
the case, there'd have been little hope for her...even had she lived, she'd 
probably never have regained consciousness."

     "But you don't think that now?" Danki asked quickly, glancing over at 
the still forms of her son and his mate.

     "No," S'lomon replied.  "Had that been the case, certain reflexes would 
have been permanently impaired.  But the tests I've given her show that not 
to be the case.  Plus, Varie has told Leis that she's certain Kellie wasn't 
underwater that long."

     "Then what's wrong with her?" Trevor asked impatiently.  "Why doesn't 
she wake up?"

     "She suffered a blow to the head, that much is obvious," the healer 
answered.  "When head injuries like that occur, the brain swells and presses 
against the inside of the skull.  That cuts off oxygen to certain parts of 
the brain, and thereby impairs its functioning.  That's what has happened to 
Kellie."

     "Then what is there to do?" Danki asked.  "Wait for the swelling to go 
down?"

     "No," S'lomon said firmly.  "This must be treated....today...if she's to 
recover.  To wait longer than that would be to risk her life.  At the very 
least, it would leave her permanently disabled."

     Trevor, Cynthia, and Danki looked at each other.  "Then what are the 
options you spoke of?" the Warrenlady asked.

     "There is a surgical procedure that can be performed," S'lomon told 
them.  "It involves scraping away a small section of the skull and letting 
the blood drain out, thereby relieving the pressure."

     Trevor winced at the thought of his mother having to undergo such a 
procedure.  Even with his limited knowledge of medicine, he knew that this 
was risky.  "What are her chances if you do that?" he asked.

     The healer sighed.  "Fifty-fifty, maybe a little better," he replied.

     Cynthia shook her head.  "S'lomon, why can't we just let Andorra try to 
heal her?" she asked.  "I know she couldn't do it yesterday because she 
exhausted herself healing Turner, but by later today she should be capable of 
trying it again.  Or, if not, we could send a rider to Daere to bring back 
the Dain Hehran healer that went there to heal their injured rider."

     S'lomon nodded.  "Yes, that's the other option.  It's far less risky to 
her, and avoids the need for intrusive surgery like I'd have to perform."

     "Then there's no question," Danki said quickly.  "We'll get Andorra in 
here to..."

     S'lomon held up a hand.  "There is a complication," he said.  "The sort 
of healing that Andorra or the Dain Hehran healer would perform has a side 
effect when this particular sort of injury is involved.  In nearly every past 
instance that I've been able to find in my books, the healing has resulted in 
the termination of pregnancy when it's in the very early stages.  And Kellie 
is pregnant."

     Trevor's mouth dropped open.  "She's going to have a...a baby...?" he 
whispered.  His own surprise was mirrored on Cynthia's and Danki's faces.  

     S'lomon nodded.  "As I said, it's in the *very* early stages...I very 
much doubt that she could even have been aware of it yet.  I happened upon it 
in the course of my own tests.  If the baby was farther along, the healing 
wouldn't likely affect it...but this early into the pregnancy..."

     Trevor clenched his fists.  "My mother's life is more important," he 
declared.  "Have Andorra do the healing." 

     Danki nodded slowly, but her expression was grave.  "I would tend to 
agree," she said.  "But it isn't your decision, Trevor."

     He looked at her in surprise.  "Then whose?" he demanded, and again felt 
Cynthia's hand on his arm.

     "Turner," she said.  "He's her mate, remember.  The decision has to be 
his, if he's capable of making it."

     "He's unconscious," Trevor pointed out.  "And if neither he nor my 
mother is able to speak for her, then the decision is mine!"  He was 
interrupted, however, by the sound of someone softly groaning across the room.
  
>>"Moootheer..." it took him two tries before anyone noticed he was awake,
then a cool hand was pressed against his forehead and Danki's soothing voice
was there speaking to him. 

>>"Shush... Don't try to talk son," she told him, and he could hear the
concern and worry in her voice. Some how it registered that not all of the
concern was for him. 

>>"Kelllliiee.... Okay?" he choked out. His throat was very dry making it hard
for him to get the words out. 

>>A glass was pressed against his lips and he took a few small sips of the
cold liquid, letting each sit in his parched mouth for a few seconds before
letting it trickle down into his belly. 

>>"Kellie... is she okay?" he asked again and heard someone in the room
sobbing. "Mother!!!"

     Trevor, Cynthia, and S'lomon stood back, letting Danki tend to her son.  
Sobbing with relief at her son's awakening, Danki first tried to keep him 
lying down...and  then, when it was clear he wasn't going to cooperate, 
gently helped him into a sitting position.

     "Kellie..." he demanded, rubbing his bleary eyes, and then squinting to 
focus on the others.  It was only a moment before he inevitably saw the still 
form of his mate lying on the bed next to his.  "No!!" he cried, struggling 
against his mother's attempt to keep him from springing out of the bed.

     "Turner, lie still!" she commanded, surprising him with her vehemence.  
He stopped struggling, but looked frantically at her and the others.  "What's 
wrong with her??"

     S'lomon stepped forward to assist Danki.  "Take it easy," he said, using 
his best bedside manner.  "Kellie's had a head injury, but we're going to 
treat her."

     "Then treat her!!" he demanded.  "Why are you just standing around...?"

     "Turner, let him talk," said Trevor, kneeling down by the bedside.  
"S'lomon, tell him what you just told us."

     In quiet, calm tones, S'lomon told Turner of Kellie's condition.  The 
smith's eyes went absolutely round when the healer told him about Kellie's 
pregnancy.  "I'm....going to be...a...father?" he stammered, sinking back 
onto the bed and putting a hand to his forehead.  "I...I can't believe it...!"

     "But if we take the more certain approach, that of letting Andorra do 
the healing, she'll almost certainly lose the baby," said S'lomon.  He then 
went on to explain the options.  By the time he was done, Turner looked like 
he was on the verge of tears.  Trevor wanted to reach out and comfort his 
friend, knowing the enormity of the decision he faced.  But he knew at the 
same time that there was only one decision the smith could make.

     And he made it.  "Save Kellie," he said, reaching out to grasp S'lomon's 
arm - so tightly that the healer grimaced.  "Whatever it takes, you save 
her!" he said.

     S'lomon nodded.  "Very well," he said.  "By this afternoon, Andorra 
should be ready to make the attempt."  He looked at Cynthia.  "If not, will 
you send a rider to bring back the Dain Hehran healer from Daere?"

     "I'll go myself if that's what it takes," Trevor said immediately.  He 
was literally shaking with relief.  He'd been nearly sure that Turner would 
make the right decision, but there'd been just the chance that it might have 
gone otherwise.

     Danki ushered them out of the room.  "Now that we know that Kellie is 
going to be okay, let me have some time with him," she told the others.  
"That was a very hard decision he made."

     Cynthia nodded sadly.  "I know.  At Kellie's age, he may have just given 
up his last hope of being a father."

     "Yes," the older woman agreed sadly.  "But it was really the only 
choice, wasn't it?"

     Trevor walked outside with Cynthia, blinking in the bright sunlight.  
"You were up all night, weren't you?" she asked.

     "Yeah," he admitted.  "I couldn't have slept if I'd tried.  Now, 
though..."

     She put her arms around him and gave him a quick kiss.  "Why don't you 
go and rest for a couple of hours?  After last night, I'd say you've earned a 
bit of a rest."

     "Are you coming with me?" he asked, managing a slight smile.

     "I've got to get my office cleaned out, now that the floodwaters are 
receding," she told him.  "But afterwards, I may take you up on it."

     She left him to return to her office, and he started to make his way 
slowly toward the warren entrance that led down to his old workshop.  It was 
high enough in the warren that it had probably stayed dry - though the 
chances were that he'd find he wasn't the only occupant.

     Before he'd gone even halfway there, however, Trissana spoke urgently to 
him.  [My rider, I need to see you!] she said.

     *What is it?* he asked, stopping to look over to where the pearl dragon 
stood.  Varie was beside her, and the green dragon was clearly agitated.  He 
felt a cold chill go through him....had something happened to Kellie since 
he'd left the room?  

     [It is not that,] Trissana told him quickly, sensing his concern.  [But 
Varie has heard from Leis what is to be done to her rider...and she has 
something to say about this.]

     *I'm listening,* Trevor said, puzzled.  *What is it?*

     [She does not agree with what Leis says is to be done...and is sure that 
her rider would not either.]

     Trevor felt a cold chill of dread go through him.  *Tell me what Varie 
said, Triss...word for word!*

* * * * * * * *
(shortly afterward, in Turner's and Kellie's room)

     Going back in to tell Turner what he'd was probably the hardest thing 
Trevor had ever done.  He almost couldn't bring himself to do it.  But he 
knew that if he didn't...if he withheld what he now knew...he'd never be able 
to live with himself.  Even if he did what he knew he must, he still wasn't 
sure he could live with himself.  Because once again, Turner would have to 
make a very hard choice that shouldn't have had to be made.  And the fact 
that he now had to make it was Trevor's own fault.

     Both Danki and Turner were surprised to see him.  "Are you all right?" 
Danki asked, seeing the pallor on his face.

     He shook his head.  "We...forgot to talk to one other who's involved in 
this," he told them, kneeling down by Turner's bedside.  "Varie."

     "V...Varie?" Turner asked, clearly surprised.

     "Yes," said Trevor.  "She spoke to Trissana.  She...doesn't want Andorra 
to heal my mother."

     "What??" Turner cried.  "But...why?"

     Trevor held up a hand.  "I'll tell you...exactly...what she said.  She 
said...that she thinks my mother would want to try and...and have the 
baby...no matter what the risk to herself, or even to Varie."

     Turner's expression hardened.  "No!" the smith exclaimed.  "I don't care 
what Varie says!  How can she even think of risking her own rider's life??"

     Trevor closed his eyes and went on, his voice quavering.  "She says 
that...what my mother wanted more than anything else...was to have another 
child...one that could she could raise and love...and who could love her 
back...like her *other* son never did!"

     Danki bowed her head.  "Trevor, Varie couldn't have meant that the way 
it sounded..."

    He turned to look at her, his face streaked with tears.  "You don't 
know," he told her.  "You don't know how it was, back at Keldarra.   She 
raised a stepson who...who hated her...and then came back and tried to 
destroy us all as...as Khazeen!"

     Turner said nothing, his eyes taking on a faraway look as he digested 
Trevor's words.  But Danki shook her head vehemently.  "But you were her 
*real* son!" the older woman insisted.

     "Yes, I was," Trevor whispered.  "And all those years, I never let 
myself get close to her...or anybody..."

     He stood up abruptly.  "And because of that, I hurt her all the more.  
And *this* is what's come of it!!"

     He slowly backed away from them.  "I'm sorry...gods, I'm sorry...this is 
all my fault.  Turner...it's your decision...and I can't help you.  I've 
already made too big a mess of things.  I'm sorry...."

     And with that, he hurried out of the room.

(Tag Barb - now Turner's got a *big* decision to make!)

* * * * * * * *

     Moments later he found himself out on the green, wandering aimlessly.  
How could he have never seen how badly he'd hurt his mother...so badly that 
now even her own dragon felt that she had to risk her life to have a child 
that could be to her what Trevor never had been?  Would the sins of his past 
never cease to plague him?

     He knew he should go back...Turner deserved all the help and support he 
could give at a time like this.  But what could he do, other than make a 
worse mess of things than he already.  No, Turner was better off without him 
around right now.  So, for that matter, was his mother.  They'd both be 
better off without him there...

     He soon found himself at the edge of the green, and sat down to stare 
blankly off into the distance.  He didn't even sense his dragon's approach 
until she'd laid down and curled herself halfway around him, bring her head 
down to rest her cheek lightly against him.

     [Please, do not blame yourself for this,] she told him.  [This was not 
your fault...Varie does not think so, and neither do I.]

     He didn't answer her, didn't even acknowledge her presence.  All he 
could think of was the fact that now his mother's life was again in danger - 
and all because of him.

(Alton - by now, Triss is probably talking to Syren about this.  I'd say that 
Cynthia's got a very depressed mate on her hands.)

Submitted by:

John

Trevor & Trissana
Kellie & Varie
Cleft Warren

T'rell & Flerrion, Daere Warren
Warrenlady Tara & Varaenna, Jasra Warren
Martyn & Havelok, Marrid Warren

     
      

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