(((NRPG:  Let's see...  I've got two choices.  I can A.) Go to bed get a 
good nights sleep and wake up fresh and ready to go.  Or  B.) stay up 
half the night writing, get three hours of sleep and wake up cranky and 
mean tempered.  Can you guess which one I'll choose?  )))

RPG:  (((Good guess!!  ;)  )))

>>>"Go on Ail," Koda thought she knew but wanted to make sure. "Just 
come out and tell me why you're here."<<<

"Well, Healer Lakoda."  Ailill clenched her hands into fists, was it 
really fair of her to ask Koda to teach her.  I mean the little healer 
already had so much to do.  Still...  She took a deep breath and blurted 
it out.  "I was wondering if you would teach me how to be a healer.  Or 
at least a Combat Medic."  She sighed.  "I volunteered."

Lakod's lips pursed.  "Are you sure of that, Ail?"

"Sure of what?  That I want to be a Combat Medic or that I volunteered?"  
Ailill chuckled.

Koda relaxed some.  "Both I supposed.  Healer training isn't easy.  Even 
if you aren't going to be a full healer.  I wouldn't want you to be 
pushed into anything.  Why is it you want to be a medic?"

Ailill shook her head.  "I'm not exactly sure.  I'm not doing this cause 
Trak's forcing me too, if that's what your thinking.  Though he did ask 
me to talk to you.  He said you wouldn't listen to him this morning.  He 
said you slammed the door in his face."  She grinned.  "I don't know 
exactlly what happened, but I do know that sometimes men need to have 
their faces slammed in doors."

She shifted her wieght, realizing that she hadn't answered Koda's 
question.  "I want to help."  She said softly.  "I want to pull my 
weight."

"You can do that as a wingrider Ailill.  The wing needs every able body 
it can get.  You don't have to do this.  It will mean pulling double 
duty for a while.  At least, when you get back on full duty."

"I want to do more than that, Healer Koda.  This is my chance to help 
people.  To help you!  You saved my life Healer Koda, and if I can help 
you out by making things easier for you, then I would be happy to do 
so."

Koda shook her head.  "Don't do this for me Ail.  You don't owe me 
anything.  I'm touched that you want to help but, you need to do this 
for you.

She sighed.  "I know.  I don't know how to describe it.  I just want to.  
When Trak first mentioned the idea I wanted to do it.  It just reached 
out to me.  I... I'm not sure why I want to Koda, I just do..."  She 
paused struggling to find the right words.  "Why did you want to be a 
healer?"

Koda didn't even have to think about her answer.

"I never wanted to be anything else for as long as I can remember. 
Because my parents were and because I idolizes them for their beliefs 
and the good they did for others," she said. "I used to sit around the
Healer hall and listen to the healers talking about this case or that, 
and they never turned away or treated me like a child whenever I'd bring
something up. I just seemed to be a natural at it. I always knew that 
one day I would be a healer and work hard to save lives like my parents 
and the other healers did."

"I guess it's something like that Koda, but it's something different 
too."  SHe looked up, meeting the healers eyes.  "If you don't want to 
teach me, or your too busy.  I'll understand Koda.  It's just, well..."

[After leaving Koda's office]


>	"I'm sorry that this ever happened.  I'm sorry I hurt you.  I'm
>sorry that I betrayed the one person whom I love with all my heart, I
>never meant for any of this to happen Ailill.  I love you."  Kendal had
>drawn closer to her.  Almost within a half step distance from her.  
Slowly
>taking her hand, he placed it on his heart.  
>
>	"I love you."  Ailill stood silent a moment, her head looking down
>as if in contemplation before she looked back up at him in response to 
his
>words.
>
>	"I hate you."  Ailill with tears beginning to swell from her eyes
>drops the scalpal and runs off.  Koda who had stood by the doorway
>listening to their argument walked out.  Kendal turned to chase after
>Ailill, but Koda stopped him.
>


She could feel the blade sliding between her ribs.  thin dark and cold, 
searching for her heart.  Blinded by tears she slid throught the Med 
Center's halls, not caring where she went.   She just wanted out!  
Kendal was an idiot if he though a few words would make this okay.  This 
would never be okay.  He swore he loved her, but then he stabbed her in 
the back.  Then as soon as he was cought he jumped back to swearing his 
love.  The blade of pain slid deeper into her chest.  She could almost 
feel it twisting.  

 She slowed to a walk as she realized that her mad dash had only led her 
deeper into the center.  "By the gods!  I'm so stupid." she sobbed.  "I 
can't even find my way out of the med center.  Why did I ever trust 
him."  

"Trust who?  And what does trust have to do with finding your way out of 
the med center."

Startled Ailill turned around to find Z'lec watching her.  She scrubbed 
at her eyes with the back of her hand.  She tried to calm her racing 
heart, and steady her breathing.  "Why is it you always find me sobbing 
in some lonely corner of the Med Center?"

Z'lec shrugged, his eyes still cold.  "Why are you sobbing this time?"

"Kendal..."  Just saying his name brought a thick knot of pain welling 
up in her throat.  "He... "  Stifling her sobs she layed her heart on 
the floor.  Telling Z'lec everything.  She wasn't sure why she was 
telling him.  Just as she didn't know why she told Waylene.  In some 
slight way telling them ease the ache.  Bairly.  Wrapped up in her own 
pain, she never even noticed the expression that colored Z'lec's face.

When her story was over she sat down hard on the floor.  "What am I 
going to do Z'lec?"  She was all out of tears,  she had been for the 
last half of the story.  Instead she sat dry eyed and emotionally 
drained praying for some sort of consolation.

NRPG;  Well is Z'lec going to give it to her, or tell her to stop 
whining and get on with her life?  

If this is short and lame I apologise.  What can you expect after 
fourteen hours without sleep?

Oh and THANKS BARB!!!!  FOr helping me out.  ((If you even want to help 
me?))

Kate!!!




Katherine Heath             *)*)(*    
      Domani@hotmail.com      \(*/      
           The Voice of...     *)     J'res and Teilaxu
                               /\         Wingrider 
     Ailill and Storm         {**}      Xylian Warren 
  Wingrider, Marrid Warren     ^^       
                               ;}      
~_------------------@__        :}         __@-----------------_~
  \__             /    `-_     /}\    _-`    \             __/
     \___        /        `'-.) }(.-'`        \        ___/
         \___   /            (  } )            \   ___/
             \_/~,_,_,_,_,.-(   }  )-.,_,_,_,_,~\_/
              *             (   }  )             *
      Liam and Lasher       0\  } /0         Kaelanori
     Searcher/Trainer       * \ }/ *         Searchling
       Geode Warren            :}:         Norwall Warren    
                              ;};          
    ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~       ;};        ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
 ~May Dragons Fly Ever~    ;;        ~Soaring on the wings of~  
    ~In Your Dreams~      ;;              ~Imagination~
    ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~     ;            ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
                           '*          

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